Pinky and Brain; Oh I mean Vinny and Danny; Sorry

By John D. McKinnon, Jr.

One of my favorite cartoons as a young adult was Pinky and The Brain. For those not familiar with this animated gem, it was a spin-off from the 90's cartoon show, "Animaniacs." The shows key protagonists were two laboratory mice by the names of Pinky and Brain. As a result of a gene altering lab experiment, these mice were granted the ability to speak, reason and walk upright. With alternatives such as hunting for cheese and running from cats, it would seem this new liberation could be considered the pinnacle of a mouse's life. These mice however, had other plans and Brain specifically seemed hell-bent on world domination. Every episode Pinky would approach Brain and say something to the effect of, "What are we doing today Brain?" Brain's response was always, "The same thing we do every day Pinky, try to take over the World." Though the spooky, monotone voice Brain always responded with was convincing, his plans were always foiled. In fact he was lucky if they both made it out of their cage by the closing credits. Pinky and Brain were polar opposites in regards to personality and intelligence. Brain as his name suggests had supreme intelligence, while Pinky wasn't too bright. In fact, Pinky appeared to be a liability and it was unclear why Brain kept him around. Possibly it was for the company. Unfortunately, the show's last episode aired in the late 90s and my television watching experience had not been the same until recently.

Not too long after that a gentleman by the name of Dan Snyder bought our beloved Redskins and brought along his sidekick Vinny Cerrato. Snyder appeared to be a genius since he built a fortune and had become a billionaire by the time he was in his 30s. Cerrato, a former college quarterback and companion of Snyder, was given the title, "Executive Vice President of Football Operations." I think that means he's something like a general manager but don't quote me on that. Danny was short in physical stature, however very powerful and smart. Vinny seemed not quite as resourceful but Danny always kept him around. Danny set the standard for aggressively spending money for players and although his teams never seemed to gel, he refused to abandon the trend. Vinny never seemed to have a definitive role and seemingly made poor choices regarding personel but Danny has maintained him throughout.

Wait guys, do you notice a parralel here? Suddenly, I just realized we may be revisiting Pinky and Brain all over again. Now all Redskin fans can relive the magic and awe that I experienced through watching one of my favorite cartoons. Sure we probably won't win a Superbowl or another playoff game until Danny fires Vinny or sells the team but look at what we're gaining in the process. Who needs an owner that makes good decisions and puts his team in a position to win when you can have an owner that wants to "Take Over The World" (Or at least the NFL). I'm suddenly realizing that the whole being a fan thing and wanting your team to win are secondary and tertiary in relation to experiencing the second coming of Pinky and Brain. Witnessing the comedic adventures of Vinny and Danny is worth the price of admission. Admittedly, before I started this article I had such a negative perception of Mr. Cerrato and Snyder but now I see them in a totally different light. Now we can join all the other NFL owners and their respective teams in laughing at the failures of Snyder's fiendish plots.

Hail To The Redskins!